"Hello, ladies and gentlemen," a voice crooned over the office intercom. The voice belonged to our temp receptionist, whose thick, curly hair and deep-I-sing-in-a-piano bar-voice reminded me of Frankie Avalon. "We are having a Thanksgiving potluck tomorrow, so be sure to sign up! If you do, you may win a free vacation day! That is all."

I decided to sign up (another vacation day wouldn't hurt) and bring stuffing. Not too hard to cook yet it is an integral part of the traditional Thanksgiving feast, I reasoned. However, as the day wore on, I began to panic as the logistics of bringing stuffing to work began to sink in. I couldn't cook it the night before. It would be cold and a giant mass of globby croutons! Stuffing should be warm and fresh from the oven! That meant I would have to get up at 4 am to make said warm and fresh from the oven stuffing.

That couldn't be too bad, right? I tried to think of the positive aspects of getting up at 4 am to make warm and fresh from the oven stuffing. Here is the list I came up with.

1. Team effort for the office.
2. Chance to win a free vacation day with contribution of stuffing.
3. I could enjoy a quiet cup of coffee while enjoying the glory of the morning light...the birds chirping...flowers blooming...like those Folgers coffee commercials (the best part of waking up is Folgers in your cup...). Oh wait, its still pitch black at 4 am. Never mind.
4. Damn, I can't think of anymore.

The fateful decision made, I went to bed earlier then normal in order to get enough rest for the 4:00 am cookfest.

Wednesday, November 25, 2003

4:00 am: A kiss on the hand may be quite continental, but diamonds are a girl's best friend...

I wake up to Nicole Kidman warbling about using jewelery as equity. Hit the snooze button. Must get up...and chop onions and celery...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

4:30 am: A kiss may be grand, but it won't pay the rental on your humble flat, or help you feed your helpless cat...

I hit the snooze button again.

5:00 am: Men grow cold as girls grow old...and we all lose our charms in the end...

If I get out of my warm snuggly bed now, I'll definitely be cold because I'm old. I hit the snooze button again.

5:30 am: But square-cut or pear shaped, these rocks won't lose their shape, diamonds are a girl's best friend!

Its too late to cook now. I'll have to buy something from the store. With some reluctance, I get out of bed and begin my morning ablutions. Damn you, stuffing!!! :p

Update: I went to the market and bought 3 lbs of green bean casserole. Thank heaven for supermarket delis.

Update Update: Green been casserole was a hit. But perhaps I should have brought this instead. (link via Ernie)