One Friday evening in the Alpha Quadrant, Capt. Mir (CM) takes shore leave to spend the night at her Mom's house. Captain Hubby (CH) is left to man the U.S.S. Starship Household.
Capt. Mir's communicator chirps. She opens a communication line.
CM: Yes...
CH: Captain Mir! We have an urgent situation! Ensign P (daughter, aged 5) was trying to open the toothpaste cap with her teeth and has sustained damage to her lower forward incisor! Request assistance!
CM: Red alert! Repeat! We are on red alert!
Klaxons wail in the background...
Counselor P (aka Mir's mom): She probably just lost her first tooth. There's no need to worry.
CM (ignoring Counselor P): Standby, CH, I will now contact sickbay...the StarFleet Corp of Dental Engineers is the best in the galaxy...Capt. to SickBay...
Doctor K: Please state the nature of the dental emergency...
CM: Doctor, Ensign P has sustained heavy damage to her forward incisor. Request immediate medical assistance.
Doctor K: It sounds like she lost her baby tooth, its normal.
CM: Negatory, Doc K., request immediate attention in SickBay.
Doctor K: Uh, I'm going on vacation tomorrow...I'll be able to see her on Tuesday...
CM: Negatory, DK. I will find another dentist. Capt out.
CM mutters under her breath as she establishes contact with back-up dentist...
CM: CM to Dr. N., please respond.
Dr. N.: Please state the nature of the medical emergency.
CM: Dr. N., Ensign P has sustained heavy damage to her forward incisor. Request immediate medical assistance. Apparently its bleeding and she's in pain.
Dr. N.: She most likely lost her first tooth a little early. Perhaps I should speak to Capt. H., since you are away, and he is actually in the hotzone.
CM: Affirmative, Dr. N. You do that...
CM waits for several agonizing minutes before comfirming with CH that Ensign P will report to SickBay tomorrow at 1230 hours.
CM (smugly): Excellent. You see, Counselor P., this is what we call due diligence.
Counselor P: This is what we call overreacting...
Capt. Mir's communicator chirps. She opens a communication line.
CM: Yes...
CH: Captain Mir! We have an urgent situation! Ensign P (daughter, aged 5) was trying to open the toothpaste cap with her teeth and has sustained damage to her lower forward incisor! Request assistance!
CM: Red alert! Repeat! We are on red alert!
Klaxons wail in the background...
Counselor P (aka Mir's mom): She probably just lost her first tooth. There's no need to worry.
CM (ignoring Counselor P): Standby, CH, I will now contact sickbay...the StarFleet Corp of Dental Engineers is the best in the galaxy...Capt. to SickBay...
Doctor K: Please state the nature of the dental emergency...
CM: Doctor, Ensign P has sustained heavy damage to her forward incisor. Request immediate medical assistance.
Doctor K: It sounds like she lost her baby tooth, its normal.
CM: Negatory, Doc K., request immediate attention in SickBay.
Doctor K: Uh, I'm going on vacation tomorrow...I'll be able to see her on Tuesday...
CM: Negatory, DK. I will find another dentist. Capt out.
CM mutters under her breath as she establishes contact with back-up dentist...
CM: CM to Dr. N., please respond.
Dr. N.: Please state the nature of the medical emergency.
CM: Dr. N., Ensign P has sustained heavy damage to her forward incisor. Request immediate medical assistance. Apparently its bleeding and she's in pain.
Dr. N.: She most likely lost her first tooth a little early. Perhaps I should speak to Capt. H., since you are away, and he is actually in the hotzone.
CM: Affirmative, Dr. N. You do that...
CM waits for several agonizing minutes before comfirming with CH that Ensign P will report to SickBay tomorrow at 1230 hours.
CM (smugly): Excellent. You see, Counselor P., this is what we call due diligence.
Counselor P: This is what we call overreacting...
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