Dim Sum Diaries
Overheard around the office today:

Coworker 1: What's that smell?
Coworker 2: Oh my god! My keyboard is on fire!

(fire was put out, but sadly, the fire department did not come. They only come when popcorn burns in the microwave)

Me & Coworker, talking about a guy who asked her out and how I think she should be assertive...

Me: You should tell him, "I am going to take you now!"
Coworker: ...
Me: What?
Coworker: What did you say?
Me: I said, you should tell the guy, "I'm going to take you now!"
Coworker: Oh. I thought you said that to me.
Me: Come here, baby. Don't run away from me, my little twinkie! I was just kidding!